I had a neighbor and I often played with her daughter. I still recall the warmth and genuine care this women gave me. Her name was Beverly. So one day I decided to share a secret. Not for sure why this particular day, not sure why not a family member but at the age of 8 maybe almost 9, I decided to unsilence myself. I stood there, spilling my "daddies secret". I'll never forget that Beverly almost fainted when asking me questions for clarity. My heart was beating so fast while standing in her kitchen. I remember the motherly embrace she gave me before I walked out her door. She was devastated and I thought....maybe I could finally be free.
She called my Mother and I sat there watching tears run down her face... after days went by the neighbor called the school to report it. In the 80's, it was a very hush topic and I was given a way "out" while speaking to the school counselor. I just recall just wanting it all to end. I wished I could've taken it back. Through this ordeal, nothing changed at home other then I wasn't allowed to be alone with my step-father that I'd known since the age of 2. I went everywhere my mom went but ofcourse things went back to normal. And though his family knew (his Mom and brothers) from him venting, it then opened up doors for his brother to start preying on me on my visits to their house...My Mother's family never knew and I was discouraged to share my truth again until I was in my 2nd year at Alabama State University and experienced my 1st major breakdown.
I suppressed images of the good times from my childhood, whole life-frames were erased from my memory. It was a way to cope, a way to be something I wasn't; HAPPY!
Then comes JOY! Follow me and help me inspire a nation.
#EndChildAbuse #SufferNoMore #SexualAbuseMustEnd #Speakup #NotYourFault #MyStory #TruTestimony #AuthorLaShaMarie
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